Christmas is all about a Gift

I have been pondering a lot about gifts this Christmas season. That is the first thing many of us do once Thanksgiving comes to a close - we frantically start looking for gifts to buy our loved ones. We spend the month of December shopping, buying, wrapping, and often stressing.

I personally have been spoiled with gifts for myself and my family this month. We have been receiving gifts for the past 12 days from secret "Jolly Friends." We have also received an abundance of candy, cookies and fudge from other friends. 

It feels good to get gifts because it shows that people love us, care about us, and appreciate us. 

I feel good giving gifts too. I have baked, my husband has made white stockings, we have written Christmas cards, printed up family pictures to share, and bought gifts that our kids and friends would enjoy.

 I also have been helping the poor quite a bit this season, and I appreciate all the help I have received from my friends in this effort. Knowing that you can help bring the necessities of life to someone is so rewarding, and helps you realize just how blessed you really are. 

Have you wondered why we give gifts at Christmas? Up until this year, I have always attributed it to the three wise men who gave the young Jesus gold, frankincense and myrrh.

Some of us give gifts because that is what everyone talks about in December. That is what the stores are telling us to do, and that is what kids expect Santa to bring.

Regardless of why we personally choose to give Christmas gifts, we put a lot of effort into making or buying them.

For some of us, we use the time leading up to Christmas as a way to scare our kids into being good. Do we ever tell our kids they will only get their gifts, and Santa will only come if they are good? Do we tell them they have to earn their gifts, that they have to deserve them?

I'll admit I have often done that in the past, and it usually works, at least for a minute. I saw a quote on Facebook about a month ago, though, that stopped me in my tracks. I wish I could find it again, but in essence it said that we don't give gifts to our children because they deserve them, but because we love them.

It pierced my heart to read that. Telling my kids they don't deserve gifts is like telling them they don't deserve my love. 

Anything my kids do wrong, I probably do something else just as wrong. I am not anymore deserving of their love than they are of mine, yet we love each other just the same.

What is even more humbling is that even though I, and you, and everyone, are imperfect and do things that aren't right, we are always loved by the greatest of them all:

"Your Heavenly Father loves you—each of you. That love never changes. It is not influenced by your appearance, by your possessions, or by the amount of money you have in your bank account. It is not changed by your talents and abilities. It is simply there. It is there for you when you are sad or happy, discouraged or hopeful. God’s love is there for you whether or not you feel you deserve love. It is simply always there." - President Thomas S. Monson

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16).

Why do we give gifts at Christmas? It isn't because of the wise men or Santa. It is because Heavenly Father gave us each His son. Jesus Christ was the first Christmas gift. 

We may go through some years when we can't afford to buy gifts for our children and other loved ones. It is hard and can be sad, but the truest most everlasting joy and cheer comes from remembering that little baby who was born in a stable, and laid in a manger.

That baby grew up to teach a higher law, set an example of love, forgiveness, hope, service, and selflessness, suffer for the sins and pains of all mankind, die a painful death on the cross, and rise again glorious on the third day. Jesus lives, and He is in Heaven with His and our Heavenly Father. 

Jesus, like Heavenly Father, loves each of us unconditionally. He smiles when we smile and weeps when we weep. He is always our friend and advocate. He knows how we feel. He wants to bless us. He wants us to return to live with Heavenly Father again. He has provided the way.

We may not always have tangible gifts tied with pretty paper and ribbons, but we will always have the everlasting gift of our Savior. He will bring us everlasting life if we but follow Him. 

He is the Gift.

Merry Christmas to all. May we always keep the spirit of Christ in our lives. 

From Weak to Strong

My husband, Jad, has been going through an IT certification program since September. He has taken four certification exams so far. In preparation for each, he has attended all of his classes, done all the labs and pretests, and spent hours and hours studying. He has also refrained from ever studying on the Sabbath Day and has made sure to spend time with his family as often as possible.

He passed the first three exams with relief, and some disbelief. He knew in each case that his prayers, and the prayers of others, had been answered, and that he received divine assistance in passing each one.

The fourth exam, the one he took three days ago, he dreaded for weeks. It would be the hardest and longest exam of the entire program, with hundreds and hundreds of pages of studying material. While preparing, Jad went through the same diligent process, studying even more to make the likelihood of him passing the exam higher.

At the time he took the exam, nobody in his class had passed it yet. Jad knew the odds weren't in his favor, but had faith that once again, his prayers would be heard because of his diligence. 

After a grueling 2.5 hours, Jad found out that he had not passed the exam. I wasn't that surprised when he called me and told me, but I knew he was disappointed.

When he got home that night, he was really down. He said that he just couldn't shake the feelings of discouragement and failure. 

I tried to comfort him by saying that it was the hardest exam and that all of his other classmates at that point had also failed.

I half-jokingly said that if he had passed it, everyone would have hated him. Then more seriously, I gently explained that now he could have empathy for how his classmates were feeling - that perhaps he could lift their spirits by listening to and relating to their feelings of defeat and frustration.

I also told Jad that if he had passed the exam, he might not take his studies as seriously, but instead think that if he just prayed enough, he would always pass, whether properly prepared or not. Jad agreed with me, as he had not felt totally prepared for that exam. We both knew this drawback was a way to keep Jad humble.

Jad was at least grateful, through all this, that he had gotten a detailed summary of his strengths and weaknesses relating to the answers he had provided on the exam. He felt glad to know that as he would soon prepare to retake the exam, he would know exactly what to focus on. Then once he passed it, he would really know the material and be able to apply it to the workplace.

As we went to bed that night, I could tell Jad still felt pained, unable to shake the thought that he had worked so hard and had nothing to show for it.

The next morning, after he said his morning prayers, Jad came to me with a little smile on his face, and said that as he was praying, a scripture from The Book of Mormon had come to his mind. As he tried to quote it, I knew exactly which one it was:

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them (Ether 12:27).

He didn't say much after that, but I knew that that scripture verse had really comforted him.



Jad has never felt that  he was the smartest person in his class. He struggles with the IT language, and has to work extra hard, and study extra long hours. One of his instructors recently told him that he is logged into their system to study and do labs more often than any of his classmates.

This scripture is such a gift to Jad, to know that if he continues to be humble and have faith, that he will become strong in his field. 

He will pass his fourth exam, and he will continue to progress in knowledge and experience. 

Jad has recently been blessed with an internship with Orange County. We know that because he patiently and prayerfully waited for the right opportunity to arise, that the right one did come along at the right time.

I am proud of my husband and all his hard work and dedication. It isn't easy to have him gone so much, and I know it isn't easy for him either. He doesn't have time to do the things he used to, but we know that he was inspired to go into the IT profession.

Regardless of the setbacks and disappointments he has in his journey to a new and better career, he will be blessed if he does his very best. 

My Favorite Piece of Jewelry

For Christmas this year, I asked my husband to get me something I already have. It's a type of ring that has very special meaning to me. Recently I have felt a very strong desire to wear this ring, or one like it, every day of my life. No longer do I want to have to choose between wearing this ring and wearing other rings I love. I want to have two rings like this that will fit on different fingers.

What kind of ring am I talking about? 

The one I have now looks like this:

It's a simple looking ring, but it is so special to me. It isn't special because of who gave it to me (I love you, Mom), or because it was very expensive, or even one of a kind. 

It is special to me for a very different reason - wearing it helps remind me of the kind of person I want to be.

The center of the ring is a shield, and in it are the letters CTR, which stand for Choose the Right. This means when faced with decisions, big or small, we will choose to do what Heavenly Father and Jesus would want us to do. 

I have had a CTR ring since I was baptized a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints at 8 years old. All newly baptized children receive this exact ring:

As a child, I often sang a song called "Choose the Right Way," which reminded me of my the meaning of my CTR ring... Choose the right way, and be happy. I must always choose the right.

The CTR logo was actually inspired from a different song that I love in my church, called "Choose the Right." My favorite verse says:

Choose the right! There is peace in righteous doing.

Choose the right! There's safety for the soul.

Choose the right in all labors you're pursuing;

Let God and heaven be your goal.

To me, the shield on the CTR ring represents a spiritual armor we choose to wear that provides us with safety from Satan's influences. 

Paul told the Ephesians to put on the whole armor of God. To him, the shield was of utmost importance:

Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

It takes a lot of faith in God to make the right choices, even when they aren't popular or easy. As the definition of good and right changes in society, we can look to God to retain the pure definitions. 



An apostle from my church, L. Tom Perry, said something I truly believe: 

There is power in a tie tack, a CTR ring, or a white dress hanging in the closet if we associate them with our desires for purity and righteousness. Even more important than physical reminders is to have the conviction deep down in our hearts to live the kind of life that will cause us to make the right choices, not only for peace and happiness in the world right now, but also for peace and happiness eternally.

I have always associated my CTR ring with righteousness, but for some reason, now more than ever I have this conviction to do what is right. That doesn't mean I don't make mistakes (I make many), but I truly desire to do my best, and to help others find the light I have. I also have a greater desire to forgive and seek forgiveness  to serve others, and to make friends everywhere I go.

This CTR ring is not just a representation of things I think are good, but my CTR ring has become a part of me. I don't like being without it, just as I don't like being without my wedding ring. They are a part of who I am, and sacred commitments I have promised to always keep. 

Do you have jewelry that has special meaning for you?